Dear Losers, 

I know this sounds stupid but I honestly know nothing about dating and I have a date next week. I’m totally freaked out. Any advice?

Corrine

Dear reader,

There is no need to fear dating. Yes, dating is awkward and stressful, and emotionally taxing. But it’s also inevitable and can be painfully hilarious. Here’s a list of dating DO’s and DON’Ts to make your dates successes, not epic fails.

DO:

-Pick out your outfit ahead of time and dress for the occasion. Dating is stressful enough, no need to add to the stress by showering your room with the contents of your closet. Decide what you are going to wear the day before and try your ensemble on incase you need to iron or have an unsightly stain on your back (true story).

-Meet him there. If you don’t know the guy well, don’t give him your address and/or get in a vehicle with him! Hello, stranger danger! Your safety always comes first. And, it’s always a good idea to tell someone where you’re going.

-Be yourself, be be yourself! Don’t say you like to watch sports with the boys if you don’t. If you like to knit and read, say so! Unless you like to read Harry Potter…keep that under wraps until at least date four.

-Eat smart. Don’t order the baby back ribs or spaghetti bolognese unless you’re prepared to look awkward slurping noodles into your mouth and/or sporting sauce on your face. As my sister and I say when we’re eating a messy meal, ‘NOT a date food!’ (and then commence grubbing).

-Demand respect. If you and your time are not being respected make like a banana and split.

-Keep your chops in check.  Always check your teeth and carry a breath freshening product on your person. No one wants to be remembered as halitosis Heather.

DON’T:

-Expect he’s going to pay. I don’t think the guy should pay on every date, but on a first date, I think it’s chivalrous for the guy to pay. But, you should always offer to at least split.

-Bring up past relationships. Major turn off. Don’t be that girl.

-Meet in a secluded place until you are certain he’s not a serial killer.It’s just not safe. Plus, awkward silence is all the more awkward when there’s no background noise.

-Flake last minute. It’s rude. I get it, stuff happens and sometimes you have to cancel. But only cancel the day of if you have a good reason. And no, “I have to wash my hair” or “I forgot the Jersey Shore finale is on tonight!” is not a good reason.

-String a guy along to be ‘nice.’ It’s not nice. It’s mean. Just be honest. If you aren’t into him, that’s okay. There are ways to let him know without being mean.

Whether you love dating or hate it, it’s something we all have to do; like going to the dentist and pay taxes. So you might as well be a smart and savvy dater. And remember, bad dates = great stories.

Photo found on http://starryskyed.tumblr.com/post/14070192704

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