So you met someone. You like each other. Really, really like each other. You did it! CONFETTI! You hit it off right away. You undersrtand each other. You love spending time together. You’re perfectly content being with one another.
But. Then this nagging thought sneaks into your brain, like an underage kid at a club.
Is there too much too soon? Is there a rule that you shouldn’t spend more than a few consecutive days together? And how soon is it to declare boyfriend/girlfriend status?
Here are some things I think you need to ask yourself:
– Does it feel right? If it feels right, it can’t be wrong.
– Are you concerned because you feel like there needs to be a certain amount of time before you’re sure of your feelings? If so, why do you feel this way? Is it pressure from your friends?
– Are you afraid of how strong your feelings are?
People are divided into two camps on this: you can’t possibly feel this way this soon vs. of course you can, some things just happen, why question it? Who are we to judge anyone’s relationships, really? There is not one type of relationship that everyone can agree on as “normal.” There is no normal for anyone. We do things how we do things and some of it is similar to what our friends do and some of it isn’t. I think that’s okay.
Again, if it feels right, it is.
Be careful not to doubt this too much. If you doubt it and project your fears, they’re going to take over your confidence, and your partner will pick up on that and start to doubt it too.
I think people have it in their heads that relationships have to be hard and challenging. There are definitely those moments in any relationship, but that should not be the foundation of any relationship, because what fun is that? You want joy! You deserve to be happy!
What do you think? Do you put a timer on your relationship?
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