It’s today’s world it’s considered kind of funny, even cute to be a bumbling mess. It works for Kate Hudson and Sandra Bullock in almost every romantic comedy. But unfortunately, in the real world being a hot mess isn’t as attractive and you’re just seen as a mess. Sometimes the world can get to you and it’s OK to have your moments. At times the only way to work your way back up is to hit rock bottom. While it may seem like things will never look up, when you finally make it back to the top there are a gem of lessons you collect on your journey back up. Here’s what I learned from my breakdown.
1) You Are In Control
When it feels like your life is spinning and you feel like you have nothing to do but stay caught in the funnel cloud and there’s nothing to do but sit and and succumb to the idea that you are the next Courtney Love- don’t! Regardless of the situation there is a way for you to take control. You might not be able to change everything at once but there is at least one thing that you can manipulate or change to start to create bigger change. Once you start making small changes, the large changes will seem easier to tackle and at some point you will have conquered the downward spiral before you had the chance to hit rock bottom. The worst thing to do is nothing at all.
2) The Only Thing That Matters Is You
How often are we upset by other people? Breakups, friends talking behind our backs, not getting our dream job. None of that has to do with you. Those are other people’s issues and for some reason or another the issue caused them to act in a way that was hurtful towards you. But if you’re laying in bed for the next three weeks moping around about how someone else’s actions affected you, now YOU are the one making you miserable. Do whatever you need to do to get your head clear and focus on yourself. What do you want? This is obviously a much trickier question than it sounds like but you figure out what it is that you want and you focus on that. There are no guarantees in life with anything or anyone and if you give up what you want out of your life for someone else you will probably regret it forever. While I wouldn’t recommend emulating most of Oxygen’s “Bad Girls Club” the girls in the cast almost every season use the phrase “You do you, I gotta do me.” So do YOU.
3) Give Love
When I’m feeling down I can be the meanest, snarkiest person on the planet, next to Simon Cowell. But it only makes me feel even worse. Wallowing in what I hate about my neighbors wardrobe isn’t getting me anywhere. But offering to dog sit for her did. I believe in the laws of attraction and when you give love and positive energy, you receive it back. So no matter how small a kind deed seems it’s worth it for you and to help brighten someone else’s day to give love instead of sit in judgement.
Having a breakdown is nothing to be embarrassed about. It happens to everyone. No one would argue that life is tough. The most important thing is to try to have a tiny bit of self-awareness and realize that this is a phase and we are not powerless against it. What have YOU learned from going through tough times?
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