Recently, as I do in times of self-doubt or self-loathing, I popped in the classic chick flick My Best Friend’s Wedding. No matter how many times I watch it, I can’t help but think that I will inevitably be in the same friend-zoned position as our lovably insane protagonist Jules. I will be chasing down the man of my dreams who is engaged to an absurdly perfect woman while driving a stolen bread van.
I constantly replay the deliciously awkward scene in which Jules attempts to explain to Kimmy why she’s the better fit for the uber hunky love interest, Michael. She compares herself to jello and then compares obnoxiously adorable Kimmy to creme brulee. “You’re never gonna be Jello!”
Now call it the winter blues, but I can’t help but wallow a bit on the fact that I totally think I’m Jello while most other girls are perfectly normal creme brulee. And when this kind of thinking happens (as it sometimes does) my confidence descends at a stunning rate.Unfortunately, I’m not alone in this ridiculous comparative mindset.
If I had a dime for every time one of my gorgeously amazing friends has put herself down while comparing herself to another girl, I would probably have enough money for a few martinis (Ooh.. there’s a thought.)
It’s easy to wish that our quirks were different, or that we were more “conventional”. If only my hair were straighter, or that space in my teeth wasn’t there, or I actually liked children, or wanted to be a teacher instead of a circus performer. If only I didn’t show every emotion I’m feeling blatantly on my face. If only I were creme brulee.
But wait. Let’s really pick apart jello as a dessert before we decide we hate it. It comes in fun colors, it can be molded into awesome shapes, it’s easy to make, it’s sweet without being too rich, and it can be incorporated into a myriad of other desserts. Creme brulee on the other hand is an indulgence. It’s expensive. You can only eat it every now and then. It’s complicated to make. Meanwhile, jello doesn’t make you gain weight and who ever, really, gets tired of jello?
So where am I going with this? Why am I pulling a Jules and comparing us to desserts? Because we too often get caught in the trap of comparing ourselves to other people who seem to have what we lack or what we want. In doing so, we often forget about all the epic attributes we have to share with those around us. For every one thing you don’t like about yourself, there are probably at least five terrific things that trump it.Don’t let your mind warp itself into thinking any differently.
And if there is something about yourself that really isn’t working, be responsible enough to admit it and change it. We all have little things to work on, but don’t go tearing up the entire package. There is no need to be creme brulee when you’re not.
Regardless of how wonky your life may get, don’t ever get sucked into the comparison game, because I’ll have you know a lot of people happen to love Jello.
Are you ‘Jello’?
Photo found on http://nightingale907.tumblr.com/page/3